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Tales from the Dorm Room

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Tales from the Dorm Room

Post by Kinalara on Wed Aug 26, 2015 10:54 am

So school's back in and crazy shit has already happened to me. I thought it would be nice to have a board for school-based nutty stories.

So this semester, Mitch is rooming with two pretty big drinkers. And, since I stay with him a lot of the time- I guess I technically am too. The huge difference between these two roomies is how well they hold all of their alcohol. Patrick drinks whiskey practically by the hour, but he holds himself very well intoxicated. Miles, on the other hand, does not.

Miles and Riley- a friend of his from across the hall- were drinking last night- approximately 6:30-ish. They were already pretty intoxicated before Mitchell, Mason and myself left to meet Brandi at Applebees for dinner. By the time we got back it was around 8:30-9:00. When Mitch and I got entered the apartment-(Mason and Brandi got a head start on us)- there was no one in the main room. So I decided to take a shower. Somewhere during my shower, Mitch knocked on the bathroom door. This happened twice-- once where he said something unintelligible, and another where he was making sure I had clothes to change into because "there are people here".

After throwing my pajamas on, I go to leave the bathroom- and was immediately shocked to find that there were not only 'people here'- but about eight of them piled up in the living room. I said a quick and frightened hello before darting into Mitchell's room to change into more presentable clothes. After about five minutes, I reemerged to find that everyone except Patrick, Mitchell, and Mason were missing. So I sat down and listen to whatever it was Patrick and Mitch are talking about. Halfway through, Patrick apologized to me for 'the scene'- to which I responded that I had no idea what had transpired. This got Patrick to smirk and ask me to follow him to Miles' room.

Upon peeking inside, I was greeted with a bare-chested 20-year-old sitting cross-legged on his bedroom floor with his entire face in a clear trashcan that he was clinging to for dear life. He wasn't moving.

It turns out that not only had Miles and Riley continued to drink after we had left, but Patrick had returned after med training to find the apartment crawling with approximately twelve 20-somethings-- all in varying stages of intoxication. The first time Mitchell had knocked on the bathroom door to get my attention was to try and let one of the people in to use the restroom because the other restroom was currently occupied by Miles- who was wrapped around the toilet. (Though this apparently didn't stop everyone from using that restroom- Riley ended up peeing on Miles anyway.)
By the time I had come out of Mitchell's room from getting redressed, the partiers had been relocated to another apartment by a frustrated Patrick. (Sans Miles who lives here, and Riley's shoes, which we will get to in a moment.)

Well, Miles finally managed to yank himself up from the floor, away from the trashcan, and into his bed. About an hour or two after Miles goes to bed, a buzzed Patrick decided to clothe himself in a black robe(Mason's bedsheet) and scythe(the vacuum cleaner), and enter Miles' room to give him a little spook. From outside I heard "Miles, i'm here to reap your soul because you're a drunk asshole" followed by some mumbling and Patrick's cackling. He came back out to inform us that his attempted soul-gathering was met with several light shoves and whispers of "sh nah, shhhhh sh nah- brah be cool, be cool".

And to wrap up the night, Patrick found Riley's shoes and started asking us for a cookie sheet to put water and the aforementioned shoes in so that he could freeze them. I'm pretty sure they are still in the freezer.

So that was how day three at Francis Marion went.
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Kinalara

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Re: Tales from the Dorm Room

Post by Kinalara on Thu Aug 27, 2015 11:24 am

Update: Riley apparently got his shoes back.
Also Mason was given Miles' hat by Patrick as punishment for Miles being, and I quote, "an imputent, alcoholic asshole".
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